Maternity Shopping...Not So Fun!

I'm a woman who could really do without shopping. I usually know what I want or need, I go in, get it, and leave. My first maternity shopping expedition was not like that at all. I knew I needed dress for Easter. I would find one and be done. Sounded simple enough, but that is not how it turned out at all!

I scoured the maternity clothes websites first. I found some very cute and very overpriced dresses. I'm not cheap but I wasn't about to pay more than $100 for a dress that I probably would only wear once during the pregnancy -- especially if we don't make it back to church (pray for us that we do). I thought Target.com and I would be friends, but the website revealed that what was in style for pregnant ladies is...BOWS!  Bows in the front. Bows in the back -- always hated tie-back fashions. Bows every-fricken-where! Who comes up with this stuff?

To avoid going to the mall and since I can still pretty much wear my other shirts and pants, I attempted to put on one of my dresses suitable for Easter church service. I have some really cute ones from Ann Taylor that I've only worn once or twice, so I figured why not. I'll tell you why. My ballooning belly cannot be accommodated by my slim-waisted Ann Taylor creations -- not even the ones with an empire waist! Devastated, I got Kyle up at the a$$-crack of dawn on Saturday and we head to Potomac Mills to visit the Motherhood Maternity Outlet, but not before a necessary stop at Denny's for an order of Moons Over My Hammy!

Turns out it wasn't so bad. Unlike the Motherhood Maternity stores I've been into at the mall, the outlet was nicely organized. The ladies were friendly -- maybe too friendly. In fact, our saleslady didn't leave Kyle's side at the dressing room. Yes, she was providing the answers to his string of questions on the difference between nursing bras and sleeping bras, the best cream to prevent stretch marks and every other question not answered during his reading of "What to Expect When You're Expecting." Glad he was getting the info, but I definitely could have done without a stranger in my audience. Ugh!

I tried on some dresses. They all had tie-backs. Doable but I really can't stand tie-backs!  Bless his heart as Kyle rationalized for me why the tie-backs have to be there. I can still hear him: "They can't just make this huge garment and not have a way for it to be slimming for you ladies. The designers just want to accentuate your cuteness."  Oh shut up, mister!

I tried on a couple of skirt and shirt combinations. Loved the skirts. The shirts, however are too damn long! Again in steps the new spokesperson for pregnant lady fashion. Kyle reminds me that "the extra length is necessary to accommodate the fact that a woman's belly is lifted from its normal position, and the shirt has to be long enough to cover it." Bless his heart, but I still needed him to shut up!

I managed to find something suitable for church and a couple of other options for when I get dressed up. All suffered from tie-back or too-long shirt nonsense, but I surrender. There's no fighting it anymore. The shopping expedition deemed a relative success, we headed back home to start cleaning out and organizing the guest room to make room for the baby. First task?  Kyle's closet.  That's a story in itself...and it's one that's only just begun.